The most effective conversation starters with girls
Getting a conversation started with a girl you’re attracted to is half the battle, and it’s well worth your time and effort to learn how to do it effectively. It will take a lot of practice, but you can learn how to break the ice by learning the most effective conversation starters with girls and practicing them at every opportunity. You should have multiple conversation starters with girls memorized and ready to go at the right time so that you never miss an opportunity. Eventually though you’ll get to the point where your ‘openers’ are spontaneous and natural coming from improvised wit.
Body Language First!
When you’re about to launch into an opener you need to have the right body language and be bringing positivity. Always smile, be confident, and demonstrate positive energy, and she will pick up your vibe and be sucked into it. On the other hand if you are anxious, unsure of yourself, and hesitant you’ll be ineffective no matter what.
You can start out by using canned openers that you can find online, but you will eventually be able to come up with your own conversation starters with girls. You’ll start to customize canned openers based on your own personality and what works best for you. You’ll also get better at determining which opener will be more effective based on the circumstance and venue. The highest level is the ability to create a ice breaker on the spot using only your charm & wit.
There are a few basic types of openers that you can start out with: indirect openers, situational openers, and direct openers. Of course there are an infinite number of conversation starters with girls that you can try, but direct, indirect and situational openers are some of the most effective and tested. Keep in mind that some of the best conversation starters with girls are simple, and you should always use the ones that you feel the most confident saying.
Indirect openers are good conversation starters with girls if you are still building up your confidence and new to the game. They don’t have sexual connotations and they offer an opportunity to start a conversation without coming across as creepy. Even indirect openers have to be executed with the right body language or they won’t work at all, but they are less risky than direct openers. Here are a few ideas:
- Hey can you give me some advice on something – my buddy is trying to break up with his girlfriend but he doesn’t know how he should end things without hurting her feelings, what do you recommend?
- Hey this will only take a second, but I need a woman’s opinion on this. My buddy is dating a girl who keeps making out with other girls every time she gets drunk…would you consider that cheating? She says it’s just for fun but he’s starting to get really upset about it.
With direct openers you show that you are upfront with your interest. Direct openers are riskier because they are harder to pull off, but if you can pull one off your chance of getting friend zoned is basically nilch. By using direct conversation starters with girls, you are demonstrating that you are interested right off the bat, and that you are an alpha male who knows what he wants, which many girls will find attractive in the right circumstance.
If you have the confidence to pull off direct conversation starters with girls, they can work great. One useful tip to remember is that direct openers tend to work better in the daytime when they are not as expected. There are tons that you can find online but here are some ideas:
- I have to go really soon but I just wanted to tell you that I think you’re incredibly beautiful and I’d love to go out for you a drink with you.
- I know this is really forward of me but I just wanted to tell you that you’re gorgeous.
- Excuse me, I just wanted to say that you are really beautiful, what’s your nationality?
Situational openers work well because they are not risky and come across as spontaneous. You’ll probably get a good response rate with situational openers, the problem is that most of them have short replies, so you will have to figure out how to keep the conversation going after she responds.
Some examples of situational openers:
- Wow it’s really cold/hot in here
- I got my girlfriend a shirt just like that, you have good taste!
- Damn its loud in here!
- Have you tried this drink yet?
- This song is so overplayed!
Which opener to use?
There’s no right answer as to which conversation starters with girls you should use — you should use openers that you are the most comfortable with and the ones you can execute confidently. Try to master just a couple of openers to start, it isn’t about how many that you know, it’s more about getting the delivery in line with what your body language is sub-communicating to the girl.
Also when you use a canned opener, make sure it’s as close to something that you would normally say as possible. That way it will come across as more natural instead of robotic. You have to use your best judgment when deciding how and when to open a conversation, and the more you practice your conversation starters with girls, the better you’ll get.
Consider the venue
There are some venues that work better for direct openers, and some that work better with indirect openers. For example if you are at a bar or a club you can usually get away with using an indirect opener because it’s not out of the ordinary to ask a girl her opinion on something when you’re with your buddies and “need a girl’s advice”, but it might be weird or inappropriate when you’re at the store. Direct openers tend to work better for your day game — when you encounter a beautiful girl on the street or in the line at the coffee shop.
Beautiful girls don’t get directly hit on as much in the daytime than they do at a bar so direct openers can be impressive to them and show that you are confident. If you aren’t sure, situational openers tend to work in almost any time because they always seem to come across as random, and aren’t likely to be thought of as inappropriate.
Practice your openers!
You can sit at home and memorize conversation starters with girls all day but you need to start going out and practicing them every chance you get. You’ll naturally learn the openers that work best for you and you’ll develop the confidence to be able to start conversations with girls you’re attracted to whenever you want.